Personae non Gratae

Persona non grata - in Latin literally means "person not welcome."  (this post's title is in plural)

Weeks ago I started writing a blog about friendships, and how I've been astounded lately at the number of "friends" who have completely distanced themselves from me through this past year.  Initially, I didn't think much about it.  People didn't know how to react, or what to say.  That is understandable.  However, as I sat and read what I'd written, I decided it wasn't fit for publication, and deleted it.

But now, I've painfully observed that I wasn't the only person who has become invisible to a host of "friends" that we shared.  Therapist, too, has been ostracized just as much - and probably more in some ways.

Up until now - tonight - I've brushed it off silently, thinking that time heals wounds and friendships will heal.  I believe I am wrong.  I've seen good Christian men and women, people who just a year ago were smiling, kind, "happy to see you" type people, become absolute strangers.  Outside of the church setting, they're happy to do business with you, or talk about kids or school or sports.  But inside church settings....no no no, we can't associate with Jim and Sonya.  I don't know what their mindset is, but it smacks of hypocrisy and just downright stinks!  Certainly, there are those saints who look beyond the surface, and know that we're just regular people trying to rebuild our lives.  They offer true, kind words.  And for them, I am deeply thankful.  For those who treat us as ghosts, vapors, personae non gratae.....I pray for you.  I try deeply to not hold any contempt in my soul, for that gives Satan a foothold and he has no place with me.

I don't normally vent in such a public, open forum.  But tonight, we - at the last minute - decided to not attend our church's informal Christmas caroling party tonight.  Why?  Because we're not sure we even want to be in close quarters with those same people who can't find time to speak to us on Sunday mornings.  That, my friends, has affected MY WORSHIP!

To all those who even think I'm referring to you, if you have to wonder, then I may be talking to you.  My feelings for you and our friendship have not changed.  I'm always available to you, to support you, to help you in any way that I can.  I just ask that you open your own eyes to see where we stand.