How blessed is the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding. ~ Proverbs 3:13
How well do we really know our mate? Do we study them in the same way we study our work, or our hobbies? Do we immerse ourselves in them to know everything we can learn about them? People are ever-changing creatures, and as such we can never fully know them. Why, then, do we stop learning about our mate after a period of time? Do we think we've learned all there is to know about them?
Or do we revel in their company, in learning about their ever-evolving personalities, moods, opinions? What are their dreams? Their fears?
Do we actually ask those questions? Or do we just assume that we know? If we dare ask, do we fully listen to their answers, and ask God for discernment and understanding?
I've failed Therapist in this regard lately. Early on we talked about a lot of these things, but I've allowed myself to get to a point in our relationship that I absolutely did not want to be. What is that point? I call it "being comfortable"...I never wanted to be fully comfortable with our relationship. I always wanted to be able to learn something new about her. But I've gotten
I love the times we set our relationship to the side and talk openly about our separate lives. We spent some time this weekend talking about our financial hopes and dreams. More specifically, I explained to her what my short- and medium-range financial goals were. We're in a relationship, and it's important that she know what my aspirations are. It felt really good to share those things with her. Yes, it wasn't the most romantic thing to discuss on a weekend outing, but it opened a door to a new depth in our relationship, and I'm looking forward to finding more of those doors.
Week 19 - Love is Impossible
Let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. ~ 1 John 4:7
This is almost the middle of the 40 week Love Dare study, and this week's lesson drives the nail home. A few weeks ago in Love is Unconditional, we talked about agape love. Agape is the love of choice, not of conditions (looks, actions, etc). It is a love that we choose to give.
But the truth of the matter is that in and of ourselves, we do not have the capacity to fully know or give agape love. It has one source: God, and God alone.
No matter how hard we try, the love we have inside us has failed to keep us from lying, lusting, getting angry, forgiving, etc. The love we have isn't sufficient. To love someone unconditionally is to know the love of God, and to use the love He gives us to love our mate.
This study isn't about getting our mate to love us more, nor is it to teach us how to love more. It's about coming to know more of the love of God and His love gift to us. Without it, we cannot love!
What is love? I may not be able to define it, but love is patient, it is kind, it is not selfish, it is thoughtful, not rude or irritable, it believes the best, and is not jealous, it makes good impressions and it is unconditional, it cherishes, it lets the other win, it always fights fair, it takes delight, it is honorable, it intercedes, it promotes intimacy, it seeks to understand, and it is impossible (without God). But above all, it is fun to love and to BE LOVED!!
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